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$xhtml = array(
	'<{title}>' => 'The vasectomy is probably on',
	'<{body}>' => <<<END
<img src="/img/CC_BY-SA_4.0/y.st./weblog/2019/01/20.jpg" alt="Another downed fence, this time seemingly knocked down by a vehicle, judging by nearby debris" class="framed-centred-image" width="649" height="480"/>
<section id="pens">
	<h2>Gel pens</h2>
	<p>
		The gel pen set I bought feels ... incomplete.
		I mean, first of all, the case is supposed to carry 72 pens, yet the set came with 60.
		What&apos;s up with that?
		That should have been the first clue to me that this set wasn&apos;t well-put-together before I bought it.
		I figured I&apos;d get some extra pens on the side to complete the set later though.
		Then, once I had the set, I noticed certain colours were absent.
		There&apos;s no good greys (one grey is glittered and the other is metallic, so they both look silver), no browns, and no cyans, just off the top of my head.
		These missing colours should be fixed when I refill them, but of course that means putting ink into pen bodies that don&apos;t match it.
		It&apos;ll work, but won&apos;t be great.
		There&apos;s also the ugly swirl pens, but again, that&apos;ll be fixed by the refills, as I can just fill the pens with better ink.
		The case also appears fairly flimsy, and even came with a couple factory defects.
		The pens have to be placed with every other one upside-down or they don&apos;t fit, and there&apos;s three odd wide slots for carrying who-knows-what instead of pens, taking space that could otherwise be used to put eight more pen slots and bring the case up to a total of 80 pens.
		Why?
		What else do you want to store with you pens?
	</p>
	<p>
		I was planning to overlook all of that.
		However, I just bought the thinnest gel pens I could find at the store, and they&apos;re too thick to fit in the case properly.
		The case opens like a book, with pens on both sides of the page.
		The pens the set came with and that the case was designed to hold are super thin, and still barely fit.
		Anything bigger, and the pens on one side crowd out the pens on the other, basically requiring a slot remain empty for each one that contains a pen.
		The set begins incomplete, but is also uncompletable, or at least it can&apos;t be completed without tracking down pens of the perfect size while probably buying a bunch of pens online that turn out to be the wrong size first.
	</p>
	<p>
		Having an incomplete set is going to drive me nuts.
		I might need to break down and just order a better set.
		One of the things I like about this set is that none of the pens have a brand on them, nor are any of the colours labelled beyond the presence of the colour in the pens&apos; plastic.
		There&apos;s another set I saw online though.
		It&apos;s a complete set that fits its case perfectly.
		There&apos;s the right number of pens for the case, and the pens all fit even without flipping half of them upside-down.
		However, the pens all have names and numbers.
		The numbers are for refilling the pens using that same company&apos;s refills.
		Of course, I have no plans to buy their expensive refills, so the numbers are just numbers, and they probably don&apos;t start from zero as they should.
		Indexing from one would bother me less than having twelve empty pens lots and three empty mystery slots in the case though.
		The names on the pens are a bigger problem.
		For the most part, from the looks of it, the colour names are bizarre garbage the company put together, not common colour names such as &quot;midnight blue&quot;.
		Rather, it&apos;s names such as &quot;party blue&quot; or &quot;celebration blue&quot;.
		It&apos;s not names that&apos;ll actually mean anything to me.
		However, these names and numbers do come with an upside: they show the company cares enough about their product to put in that effort.
		It&apos;s a smaller pen set, but I think it&apos;s a better put-together pen set.
	</p>
</section>
<section id="cleaning">
	<h2>Cleaning</h2>
	<p>
		I got a little more cleaning done today.
		I&apos;ve had a sink full of dishes for a while now, and that&apos;s cleared out.
		They weren&apos;t dishes I&apos;d used, but rather second-hand dishes I&apos;d acquired and wanted to wash before using.
	</p>
</section>
<section id="hair">
	<h2>Hair removal</h2>
	<p>
		I don&apos;t seem to be as motivated as I should be on the job-seeking front; not nearly as motivated as I was last January, before my shift leader lied to me and wasted a year of my life.
		At this point though, if I don&apos;t find a job, it&apos;s fully on me, not them.
		Anyway, I&apos;ve got to get something done, so since I&apos;m not doing much with the job hunt until Tuesday, I started looking at hair-removal options.
	</p>
	<p>
		It seems that due to hair thickness and hair density in the beard area, electrolysis simply isn&apos;t very effective.
		Instead, $a[laser] hair removal is the only real option I could find.
		That&apos;s fine, as it was what I was mostly considering anyway, but now I know it&apos;s probably the only way, so my thoughts won&apos;t wander from that method any more.
		There are several places that offer the service in the next city over, but I could only find one that offered it here in my city.
		I&apos;ll probably pay them a visit on Wednesday and get more information.
		I biked over there today to make sure I could find the place, and it&apos;s right near one of my credit unions.
		That won&apos;t be hard to remember at all.
	</p>
	<p>
		Hair removal will take time.
		Once I&apos;ve got the appointments set up, I suppose I&apos;ll turn my focus to the vocal lessons.
		Last time I looked for places offering vocal lessons in the area, I could only find services 
	</p>
</section>
<section id="ill">
	<h2>Feeling ill</h2>
	<p>
		While I was out, I suddenly began to feel very ill.
		My stomach is uneasy, and hurts a little, and I have a light headache.
		This was particularly unpleasant because I needed to be at work in a couple hours.
	</p>
</section>
<section id="vasectomy">
	<h2>Vasectomy</h2>
	<p>
		Previously, I came to the conclusion that a vasectomy wasn&apos;t nearly effective enough, and that as a result, I should only date males.
		That way, there&apos;d be zero chance that I&apos;d accidentally impregnate them.
		The risk that I might impregnate a female that claimed they&apos;d want an abortion but that changed her mind after getting pregnant was just too high.
		Creating children in immoral, and I don&apos;t want any part of it.
	</p>
	<p>
		However, I came to realise a new perspective on the matter today.
		If I settle down with a male, they&apos;re probably going to be a gay male, which means they&apos;re not going to be having children if they partner with someone else instead of me.
		If I partner with a female though, I might be able to talk her <strong>*out*</strong> of wanting children.
		By marrying a male, I find myself in a situation in which I don&apos;t take a huge risk with the future of the planet, but at the same time, there&apos;s no reward beyond my lifetime, either.
		It&apos;s zero loss, but zero gain.
		If I marry a female though, there&apos;s a small chance of causing huge damage, but a great chance of actually preventing damage.
	</p>
	<p>
		I&apos;m by no means planning to specifically choose to date only females, but I think I&apos;m ready to embrace both sides of my sexuality and date whoever makes me happy.
		Not that I&apos;m ready to date at all, at this point.
		This school drains me too much, so I wouldn&apos;t have enough energy to put into a relationship to give my romantic partner what they deserve.
		It&apos;ll have to wait.
		Still, I think I&apos;ll be getting that vasectomy after all.
		I&apos;ll want to get it during a term, though.
		For the smallest risk of complications, they want me to take a week off from work, and not get much exercise.
		I&apos;ll be stuck at home, not being productive.
		That is, unless I&apos;ve got coursework to be productive with.
	</p>
</section>
END
);
